When is the right time?

It's been a week since Lucid's dance concert #CurtainCall but I'll be blogging about it later.

#CurtainCall - Huling Sayaw

When do you know that it's the right time? I think you don't wait for the right time. You create it. There is no point in waiting for the if you're not doing your part to get it. But what if... all this time, after all that have happened to me for the past months (accepting Lucid, sacrifices, relationships), all that I've done, all this time I've prepared myself to tell you everything, as I don't want to hold back anymore... It's just not happening right now. You know me, I will if I could but suddenly a lot of factors again to consider.

I've always considered everybody's feelings. What's the best decision for the org. Serving others. The best interest for my family. To the point that I'll be the one adjusting and making the sacrifice. Don't get me wrong. I don't regret anything that I've done and I would love to still serve at any given opportunity. but now, when everything is about to end... That it's my turn to make myself happy, why do I still need to make that sacrifice? 

If I could just laugh it all out. I would. Well, I've been try to. But sometimes I just can't help myself not to stop, stare and look far away thinking...

"Start appreciating the memories you have and stop begrudging the ones you never got to make." - The Lucky One

For my past posts, I've just been grateful for everything. Successful dance concert, heart warming feed backs and compliments, supportive friends and family. I appreciate every one of them, every single memory, every single experience that I've learned...

I think I can still make this one. I didn't say I won't do it but just when is the right time?

MONG

Desire VS Reality

A blog post from Parky-park

We all want that kind of relationship where we’re always next to each other, giving each other hugs, holding hands, giving each other kisses, and just being in the presence of one another. But instead, we’re all distanced out and simply not giving each other the love that we’ve imagined giving one another. We’re rarely there for each other, giving each other a hard time, not telling each other the truth, and simply just disregarding one’s needs. Along the way, you’re wondering why you’re not talking to each other, or why you guys aren’t together anymore. Well the answer to that is endless, but one main reason is that you weren’t there for each other & they just didn’t want a relationship that was too distanced. Giving your boyfriend or girlfriend the love that you’d want in return is something you should be aiming for. Don’t neglect them, instead be there for them, show them you appreciate them, make them happy, and just show them you still have the same feelings as you did when you first went out. Don’t be with them if you’ve lost feelings for them because in the end, you’ll be hurting them. Just have a relationship based on the truth, not on lies.

Wag kang magpapa-pressure.

I'm back! After a week stay at my grandmother's house at Los Banos, I'm back here at Sta.Rosa! Well I was already back here yesterday and it was just now that we had our internet connection back.


So updates:

Thursday:
Went to Taft to get the "adjustment form" but failed because it didn't had anything to do with me. Left the house at 10am then got there around 11:30am, IT WAS SO HOT AND IT HAD NOTHING TO DO WITH ME. Ate lunch at KFC then off to Los Banos. It was around 1pm and my head was aching because of the heat. :|

Friday:
Saw my YFC family. Went to St. Therese for Quench. It was fun having time to worship God. :)

Saturday:
Just stayed at home. :p

Sunday:
Celebrated mother's day with my grandmother, our cousins went to our place and spent the whole day together. Later that night, went to church with Vikko and Jerome. Tita Oyie, Jerome's Mom treated us mcdo after mass. :)

Monday:
Philippines 1st automated election. Hanged out with my elementary classmates, updated each other, laughed a lot, joked big time. Seeing each other before splitting in college.


Tuesday:
Valsalice reunion at Villa Casseres, only few attended. Jerome got fucked up! Sir Renz wasn't there he was a Poll watcher for Erap daw. :)) I saw Jing there! Nagparamdam din!

I realized many things this past week, what I really need to do. I was scared for college, the feeling of being rejected, the feeling of screwing up my studies big time, the feeling of failing my family and everyone whom is supporting me.

I realize that even that how much your friends are supporting you, or giving you advices will not work unless you help yourself. I prayed a lot, to God. For Him to help me with my feelings and of course with comforting from my love, the feeling of being scared slowly went away. I felt that God touched me and whispered, "It's okat, I'm here. I will never leave you."

From that day on, I was smiling again. Real. :)